Funny Instagram captions
1. If you think nothing is impossible, try slamming a revolving door. ― Funny Instagram Captions
2. I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones… that’s why it’s called a “cell” phone. ― Funny Instagram Captions
3. There are 100 billion nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them. ― Funny Instagram Captions
4. Your secrets are safe with me… I wasn’t even listening. ― Funny Instagram Captions
5. You never realize what you have until it’s gone. Toilet paper is a good example. ― Funny Instagram Captions
6. I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box… I don’t even know where the box is. ― Funny Instagram Captions
7. Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent. ― Funny Instagram Captions
8. I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my fingers because I can always count on them. ― Funny Instagram Captions
9. Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job. ― Funny Instagram Captions
10. It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head, I’m quite busy. ― Funny Instagram Captions
11. When people tell me “You’re going to regret that in the morning,” I sleep in until noon because I’m a problem solver. ― Funny Instagram Captions
12. Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you’re done. ― Funny Instagram Captions
13. If you fall, I will be there. Signed: Floor. ― Funny Instagram Captions
14. You can’t run through a campground. You can only “ran,” because it’s past tents. ― Funny Instagram Captions
15. Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt. ― Funny Instagram Captions
16. Out of my mind! Back in five minutes. ― Funny Instagram Captions
17. Vodka may not be the answer but it’s worth a shot. ― Funny Instagram Captions
18. Wine + dinner = winner ― Funny Instagram Captions
19. I never make the same mistake twice. I make it like five or six times, you know, just to be sure. ― Funny Instagram Captions
20. Yesterday I really wanted tacos. Now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams. ― Funny Instagram Captions
21. I need a six-month vacation twice a year. ― Funny Instagram Captions
22. I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions. ― Funny Instagram Captions
23. You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach. ― Funny Instagram Captions
24. Reality called, so I hung up. ― Funny Instagram Captions
25. I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it. ― Funny Instagram Captions
26. “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” ― Funny Instagram Captions
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